Today is a bad day and I feel overwhelmed with the enormity of it all,tomorrow is another day and my fight will be back.I'm just so very grateful to have somewhere to go to have a bad day and not feel as if I need to justify how I am.I tend not to join groups or talk much as I try not to burden other people with my problems,people have their own stuff to deal with,they don't need me dumping my crap too! Plus I can't be all rainbows,butterflies and lollypops,that's not my nature so I would come across as exceedingly fake.
I was asked to tell my story for the MS Network magazine but so far I haven't,I'm not very inspiring and can be downright grumpy!!(hard to believe I know,but yeah,I can be grumpy!) I don't think people who are fighting MS need to read a story from someone who's far from positive and a long way from inspirational.My biggest achievement in the last 6 months was walking to the letter box unaided,a long way from a marathon!!
Sometimes I just grow tired of the battle and need to lower my sword and rest,sometimes I need to feel the bad feelings and regather my strength to go forward again.Sometimes I just need to say "Woe is me" Sometimes I need a shoulder,instead of lending mine to everyone else.Sometimes,just sometimes I need to sing "What about me,it isn't fair.I've had enough and I want my share" Sometimes I just need to drop the brave,strong,courageous face.Sometimes I just feel sad.Today was a "sometimes" day.
Today I need to vent,despair and lay down my sword,tomorrow I will pick it up again and continue the fight.......
No comments:
Post a Comment