This is going to be a way for me to process all my thoughts and feelings that I have trouble expressing out loud.It's hard for me to process what I am actually trying to get across at times,with the interruptions to my thinking and losing words I was going to say.I just need somewhere to try to express my self without worrying if the word I wanted to say was actually the word I used! I think it's going to be easier if I cut myself some slack and just type not checking for punctuation or spelling errors and constantly stopping to edit.Otherwise any brilliant insights I have are going to be lost!! (Hopefully I might get some brilliant insight!)
Anyway,It's nearly 6am and I've been up for 3 hours already,steroid insomnia has struck and I've done everything I normally do to try to sleep,so instead of chasing sleep I decided to give up on it for now,this will pass and so far apart from a bit of a nagging stomach I'm not doing too bad,haven't got majorly down on myself or bitten anyones head off yet! There's still time though,still 4 more days of prednisone to go.
MS,what the hell is that,all I knew of it was that my kids used to do the read-a-thon when they were in Primary school.That and Susan from "Neighbours" had just been told she had it about 3 weeks before,so there I was a bit relieved I suppose,it wasn.t a stroke or an anuerisn or a brain tumour,the other possible causes of the symptoms that had bought me to the hospital,so it wasn't that bad was it? I mean just give me the medicine I need and I'll be on my way.Dumb?Naive? Yep,now I know a lot different and learnt a lot about something I don't want to know about and 3 years in I'm still learning and I'm still waiting for that medicine(aren't we all?!) It's been a tough 3 years but I think I might just about be over my grief and anger and rage and confusion and Why me? Still who knows I certainly don't
No comments:
Post a Comment