How I hate them! I feel like I'm in a coffin or being buried alive.Such an awful,awful machine.I know it's a necessary evil but how I hate the way I feel inside it.
I've been trying not to sleep so when I get inside it the tiredness and exhaustion I'm feeling will over ride the panic I always feel.Think I'll take an anxiety tablet too,maybe I'll be so relaxed I might fall asleep,Yeah,as if!!
I'll go thru my usual routine ,same music.I listen to an 80s mix,takes me back to a time when I was young and free and had no worries except did I have enough money for drinks Saturday night!
I'll try to imagine that the breeze blowing on me is from the cool breeze blowing off the ocean as I lay back on my lounger waiting for the hot drinks waiter( the radiographer! least there's one good reason to go) to bring my next cocktail!
The noise,I'm yet to work that into my day dream it's hard to incorporate the noises into my dreaming,doesn't really fit with lazing on the beach.I just try to ignore it.
Neurologist visit is in 2 weeks,fingers crossed and hoping there's no new lesions and really,really desperate for the ones I already have to be healing.
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